Friday, 31 December 2021 7:00 PM –
Sunday, 2 January 2022 12:00 AM
Synopsis: In this New Year’s workshop we will ponder images and texts from the Christian
East and West that depict our inner renewal in Christ. First is the Eastern icon of the
Anastasis or resurrection; second is Dante’s depiction of transformation in the end of the
“Purgatorio” and the “Paradiso” of his Divine Comedy; third is St. Gregory the Great’s model
of contemplation and renewal at the end of the Life of Benedict. Handouts of texts and images
will be provided to workshop participants.
Presenter: Father Luke Dysinger – Fr. Luke has been a monk of Valyermo since 1976. He is
a priest and a physician who writes and teaches in the fields of mystical theology and
biomedical ethics. He earned a Ph.D. at Oxford University and currently teaches at St. John’s
Seminary in Camarillo, CA as well as online courses.
I have made several life-course adjustments in the last 12 months:
- I am trying to shift away from viewing myself as a “human-doing” and instead acting more like a “human-being”. I cut my “in-office” working hours back to as little as 1 day/week. I am winding down my development activities for GEO. I haven’t quit the business, but it will have to succeed or fail, on it’s own. I have done my part. I am putting it into God’s hands to do with as He pleases.
- I started riding my bike regularly (1100 miles total in 2021). I am telling people I’m semi-retired, so I can take advantage of the freedom, finances, and health that I have available to me during my 60’s. I probably won’t have any stronger combination of these 3 things for the rest of my life.
- I quit Water of Life after 20 years, and I joined First Presbyterian Church of Upland. This church has a slower pace, and less competitive spiritual atmosphere. There, it’s OK to just enjoy God. I don’t have to prove anything to anyone. They also practice a very different style of discipleship and teaching. They believe that it’s the Holy-Spirit’s job to teach, preach and apply Scripture to me on a regular and personal basis. The pastor is just a “facilitator ” in that process. Now it’s more important that I listen all the time to the Holy Spirit and process what He is saying to me.
I had no idea how these events would relate to this year’s retreat. But, they absolutely and profoundly do.
On the first evening of the retreat, we were told about the topics we would be learning about over the next day and a half. I didn’t expect much from the “syllabus overview”. However, a very powerful idea was expressed by Fr. Luke regarding the close and permanent intimacy that God wants with us. He wants us to receive the transforming effect of His divine grace, through the work of the Holy Spirit, by the atonement of Jesus Christ. We will refer to this transforming effect as: the NEW LIFE.
After “the Fall”, God could have forever separated Himself as SPIRIT from his human creation as FLESH. But, He didn’t do that. Instead, God embraced His creation, joined with His people and became like us, in all ways, except without sin. Here are some examples of God’s tremendous efforts to restore perfect/eternal unity with humanity:
- God the Son became flesh, taking on human nature in bodily form, with all its limitations. Instead of appearing as a supernatural “other worldly” alien being, unrecognizable to us… He came as a baby, something we can all identify with.
- God the Son was born to a human mother, just like us. He could have “materialized” out of thin-air as a fully formed adult. But, growing up human is an experience he shares with all of us.
- God the Son was transfigured during his life of ministry on earth. During this event, his Glory was revealed but without losing his essential human form. His humanity was elevated to a higher expression, but not replaced with an intangible, untouchable non-human form. This reminds me of the same elevated human form that Jesus will come back to earth with, as described in the Book of Revelation.
- When we die, we will not throw away our flesh once and forever. As if God were saying, “Good riddance to bad rubbish”. We will not become non-corporeal spiritual vapors, floating endlessly in the clouds with God’s Spirit. We will instead be given a new flesh, without corruption. God does not hate the flesh, He hates the ways we misuse and abuse the flesh He gifted to us.
I was immediately struck by the love God has for our humanity. He doesn’t wish we were pure spirit-beings. He already has the angels for that. Instead, He has elevated our tri-part existence (body, soul, and spirit) to be “a little lower than the angels”, the crown of His earthly creation. Throughout human history, God has demonstrated His
unwavering loyalty to human-beings. He doesn’t want us to lose our humanity, He wants us to re-discover it in all it’s true glory.
God is saying to me that He doesn’t want me to be less of a human, in order to be more like Christ. Just the opposite. God wants me to have a NEW LIFE as a better human. I so want to learn to be truly balanced in all aspects of this NEW LIFE. I want to enjoy being human, enjoy being God’s child, enjoy being alive. Because in Heaven, I will retain at least some similarities to the humanity I now experience, even though it will be a transformed humanity. God doesn’t offer me an escape from my humanity. He offers to make me into the “perfect humanity” that He originally designed me to be.
In the morning on Saturday, the theme was, “Our WILL has the power to accept or reject God’s invitation to first receive NEW LIFE and then to give away this NEW LIFE to others”. However, we often fail to receive this new life by not having the proper mindset. We can focus so much energy on not sinning, we don’t reach for the highest and best that God offers to edify our human-ness. We try so hard to not fall down, that we don’t go anywhere. God wants to create a better version of ourselves, today…. Not waiting for heaven, but here and now on earth. In the words of St. Bernard: “Arise by faith, run by devotion, and open by confession”. I think the point of this is to exercise our will to believe, to act and to speak. In this context, our NEW LIFE is like a bird that is hatched, set free, and flies.
This afternoon we discussed 2 prerequisites to properly and fully receive this NEW LIFE (whether in part or in whole). Using Dante’s “Divine Comedy” as a word picture, we must cross two rivers before entering paradise: Lethe and Eunoe.
- We wade through the river Lethe (Greek for “forgetfulness”) which purges our memory of our sins.
- We drink from the river Eunoe (Greek for “good mind”) which strengthens our memory of those good things we accomplished in life.
First, we must continually confess and forget our life’s sin. We can never enjoy God’s Presence if we are feeling miserable about our past mistakes. It is wrong to obsess over our failures. We must give everything to God, our obedience as well as our disobedience. We enjoy handing Him our successes, but we often choose to withhold
our failings. But, this is a mistake. Because when we give Him the burdens of our sin, God can then transform them into something useful and of benefit. Grace exists in order to bring about not just the legal forgiveness of sin, but also the functional remolding and reshaping and re-purposing of it into something beautiful. This is a critically important operation of grace. Grace takes broken things and miraculously reinvents them into blessings.
Isaiah 63:3 – “… to give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they might be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the LORD, that he might be glorified.”
To forget my sins is very hard for me. I use guilt to motivate myself, in order to be more moral. It is a foolhardy attempt at self-sanctification. And this is exactly what prevents me from daily exchanging my filthy rags for clean robes. This exchange is readily available to me, but I often refuse, out of a desire to direct my own journey towards righteousness. God is saddened by my pointless and pitiful choice to not enjoy spiritual
cleanliness every day.
Philippians 3:13 – “forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things
which are before”
Second, we must constantly remember our life’s blessings. This is easier, but I dare not indulge myself in these thoughts too long. I am afraid of becoming careless as a result of too much of these “glad remembrances”. Once again, God is saddened by my unnecessary harsh self-treatment. It’s rude to not enjoy a gift God gives you.
Psalm 103:1-5 – “Bless the Lord, O my soul, and all that is within me, bless his holy name! Bless the Lord, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits, who forgives all your iniquity, who heals all your diseases, who redeems your life from the pit, who crowns you with steadfast love and mercy, who satisfies you with good so that
your youth is renewed like the eagle’s”
A short, but significant, statement at the end of the afternoon was, “God doesn’t ask us to succeed, but only to try.” I guess He knows better than to expect me to succeed, so He has already supplied all the grace that I need. All I have to do is keep trying.
2 Corinthians 12:9 – “And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.”
This evening we discussed personal, private, individual revelation. This is a type of communication from God that is designed to be of particular spiritual benefit to me. It may or may not help others, but it definitely is for me to hear and understand. During chapel, God explained to me that there are several aspects of the NEW LIFE that are
specific and unique to me:
- I am a unique individual, so my NEW LIFE in Christ is also unique to me. My NEW LIFE looks and acts in ways that are completely my own, designed specifically for me by God’s original thoughts about me before I was born.
- My NEW LIFE is delivered, born and nurtured by God in a unique process, based on the combination of His Divine Will for me and my degree of cooperation with Him. This process may be easier or harder based on my degree of compliance.
- The end result of my NEW LIFE cannot be stolen from me, nor can it be ruined. So, even my mistakes, failures and sins will be used by God to accomplish the good result of His Plan for the eternal outcome of my NEW LIFE.
So, what is this NEW LIFE God wants me to possess? Simply, it is my sanctification. It’s Sunday morning. I’m asking the question, “What does the journey look like ahead?” I don’t expect an answer, but my optimism about the future has been re-affirmed. My NEW LIFE keeps coming closer. I may get a little confused and lost along the way, but “God’s got this”.
FINAL THOUGHTS:
I came for the first time to St. Andrew’s Abbey, looking for spiritual renewal, refocus and reinvigoration. I found it that year, and I keep finding them every year. I think God has been trying to turn my mind and heart in a new direction for the last 3 years. I am slowly responding to this new way forward.
During the 2019 year-end retreat, God spoke deeply to my heart about his infinite love, grace and mercy to me…. a sinner. Rather than focus all my attention on feeling bad about my sin, God wanted me to appreciate and enjoy Him, and His grace. I was so busy beating myself up for my failures and faults, I couldn’t find the time to be thankful and joyful towards my Heavenly Father. This realization was an inflection point in my life, but I didn’t realize it at the time. I needed a whole different way to access spiritual truth. The Catholic community at Valyermo has proven to be a reliable means for God and I to connect.
During the 2020 year-end retreat, God explained to me that He was seriously interested in talking to me … about me. That was a call from God to begin a journey of “interiority”. God wanted me to understand myself much better and deeper than ever before. I always thought that it was selfish to talk much to God about myself. It turns out that I have a lot of “bugs on the windshield”, which prevent me seeing God clearly. Washing my windshield involves concentrated interiority. And interiority is part of being a human.
